Tips to Better Give and Receive Constructive Criticism
Discover tips on how to deliver and receive constructive criticism.
Constructive criticism–also known as constructive feedback–is the act of providing feedback to someone in order to better their performance. This interaction usually occurs between two or more people and there are two positions–the person who is giving the feedback and the person receiving it. If given and received in a mindful way, constructive criticism can provide someone the guidance they need to advance their growth and skills.
Giving constructive criticism is a common way for people to communicate where improvement could be made or maybe where expectations aren’t being met. It is important to be mindful when giving feedback. Sometimes something as “small” as tone of voice or body language can be seen as threatening to the person receiving feedback. Learning to provide mindful, productive constructive criticism is an essential part of managing both personal and professional relationships in your life.
Receiving constructive criticism can be an uncomfortable experience–no one likes to hear about mistakes they made or how they might be falling short. Research has found that our reaction to negative stimuli is more sensitive so we may experience a more intense reaction when receiving negative feedback (Baumeister et al., 2001).
Constructive criticism is a powerful tool for learning and growing in just about every area of life. Whether in a personal or professional setting, receiving feedback can illuminate where you might need to improve. It is important to remember that no one is perfect and every person has areas of life where they could be better. This doesn’t make you a bad person–it simply makes you human.
Receiving feedback is an essential piece of the learning process. “Constructive feedback is a powerful tool and facilitates the learner’s professional and personal development” (Bhattarai, 2007). The process of giving and receiving feedback can help improve communication skills and reflection. Therefore, learning to give and receive constructive criticism can be beneficial in most areas of life where you need to communicate with other people. Even if they are uncomfortable, tough conversations can help strengthen your relationships with others.
“With no positivity, there is no hope; with no negativity, there is no improvement.”
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Delivering constructive criticism can be a daunting task. With practice, patience, and tools you can learn to give feedback in a mindful, productive way.
This method uses positive feedback as a way to soften the blow of constructive criticism. Essentially, you “sandwich” the criticism between two pieces of positive feedback. This highlights where the person is shining while also showing them where they could improve.
Try to avoid one-sided conversations when delivering constructive criticism. Approach the situation with curiosity and the intent of trying to understand where the other person is coming from. Offer solutions and tips you have found useful if you think they might help the other person.
When delivering constructive criticism, it is important to be mindful of your tone and body language. Try to maintain a friendly, curious state of mind. Harsh tones or negative body language (such as crossing your arms) can make people feel defensive.
Providing constructive criticism to others takes time and practice. There is a fine line between providing constructive feedback and outright criticizing someone. However, it is also important to give feedback if something needs to be improved. Outright praise is not always helpful.
Consider the following constructive criticism phrases which you can use in various situations. Try to preface the criticism with acknowledgment of what the person is doing right.
● That’s a good idea but I’m not sure that would work because _______.
● We can look at this mistake as an opportunity to improve.
● What do you think are the reasons we have had trouble with this project?
● It seems like you are struggling to meet your deadlines and I would like to help you with some time management strategies.
● I am happy that you are excited about this project but sometimes when you get excited you cut other people off in conversation.
Receiving constructive criticism does not have to be an unpleasant experience. With a few tips, you can learn to hear criticism with a receptive ear, process the criticism, and incorporate the helpful feedback into your life.
When receiving criticism, try to remain calm and grounded in your body. Try not to let your emotions get the best of you. Hopefully, the person giving you constructive criticism is doing so in a kind, helpful manner. However, if the person is being condescending, it is even more important to remain in control of your emotions so you can respond in a mindful way.
Try to listen and really understand what the other person is trying to communicate to you. Avoid interrupting or responding with a rebuttal right away. If you don’t understand something, make sure to ask clarifying questions.
It can be difficult to learn that we have made mistakes or have not been doing something right. If you find that the criticism has made you emotional–this can even happen when given in a positive way–allow yourself time to process. Ask to step away from the situation or for some time to respond to the feedback if you need.
Some pieces of constructive feedback you receive will be immensely helpful while other pieces will be useless or even hurtful. It is important to learn how to discern which pieces of feedback to keep and which pieces to discard. Try to incorporate the useful pieces into your life and see if you notice any benefits.
Constructive criticism is the feedback that is given with the intent to improve someone’s behavior or performance. This criticism should be delivered with the purpose of building someone up to be better rather than tearing them down to make them feel bad. Learning to give productive constructive criticism and how to receive and respond to feedback in a mindful way can help you grow. Constructive criticism can be a powerful tool to facilitate both personal and professional development.
● Baumeister, R. F., Bratslavsky, E., Finkenauer, C., & Vohs, K. D. (2001). Bad is stronger than good. Review of general psychology, 5(4), 323-370.
● Bhattarai, M. D. (2007). ABCDEFG is – The Principle of Constructive Feedback. Journal of Nepal Medical Association, 46(167).
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